EPISODE 4: Jackass' Dave England

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Show Notes

On this episode of The Shi**iest Podcast, Poopies talks to fellow Jackass co-star Dave England!

Watch it on YouTube! Sponsored by Manscaped! For your 20% discount go to: Manscaped.com Enter promo code "Poopies20" at checkout!

Transcript


All right, you guys. Welcome
to the POOPIES podcast. We have the

original poopies, Dave England. Yeah, yeah, day did. You'RE gonna

like set the bar right here.
It did. For Real. Quay up

there. I heard you were the
funniest podcast on Steveos wild ride. Oh,

I think I've just because of the
story I was telling all dude,

I watched it was the funniest thing
ever. That was the fun time and

parent hell impairs. Yeah, yeah, so be in the original poopies.

What he goes? What? No, I don't know what I'm talking about.

Yeah, I'm just glad. I'm
glad to have you. Did.

This is going to be awesome.
I'm having you. I know I did.

Yet you're having me. I've already
you. Yeah, I think so.

It's cracking. The poopies podcast.
I know it's weird, Dude.

I I'd never thought of my life
I'd ever have you on a podcast.

I never thought of my life I'd
ever have a podcast. So neither did

we, poopies. Rather did we
call everybody. And welcome to the shittiest

podcast hosted by poopies. This week
poopies is joined by Jackass Costar, former

professional snowboarder and one bald legend,
Dave England. Let's get right into it.

There's my phone. I got a
couple questions. You wrote down stuff.

Yeah, I actually did put your
hands together from hey you. Are

you on drugs? No, not
any. Just wait. Yeah, fucking

Hell, yeah, the shittiest podcast
in the world. We're back at the

Pope Fat podcast with the Ledge Dave
Egely, prior of the red deer on

jacket. Oh, for sure,
dude. Definitely, Dude. We're number

one movie right now. Still,
still, are we? Hell, yeah,

yeah, I know that. That's
awesome. I think so. I

got deep thrown by now? I
don't know, I don't think so.

A couple weeks, right. How
are yeah, we well, there's this

in a days. I don't even
know. I was like it's been a

leaf the week, right, two
weeks? Two weeks, I think.

Yeah, weeks. Yeah, that's
crazy. Yeah, man, it was.

I've seen in the theaters like five
times. Did you? Where did

you see it? Oh, I
just thought at the Ventura Theater. said

it thought that one night at the
premier. I've only see that twite.

Really. Yeah, I was frothing
on it, Dude. I was like

watching all the time. Where I
was gonna the wow five. I'd like

to put my hood on and make
sure no legs on me and I can

just get me back in the back. Yeah, last night I took some

chick from Lakeside San Diego to the
movie last night. Yeah, what do

you think? She loved it.
Bet She loved it. Not to love,

you know. Yeah, she is
laughing and yeah, she loved doing.

We are jump roping with our penises
of freaking trigger Wanning Dick's jump roping

with our penises of freaking freaking stuck
together. I saw that in there.

I was sitting next to my my
two oldest kids, when the first time,

oh, we watch that the premiere. They're all all dad's Dick Hook

to the other Dude Dick. I
know did I was. I was hoping

they weren't gonna fucking show that,
and they did. I was like,

AH, that's not me, don't
look. I know it. I know

I did made it. I was
like, man, I was you and

it did. Yeah, fuck,
yeah, we made it. I know

it. Can't think about it.
There's no going back now. There's no

going back. I remember that day. I was the first, like first

as a second day of the test
shoot and I was like our last night.

And Yeah, I got pretty crazy
in that room. Yeah, it

was like that. It was just
dusk outside. It was like the end

of the day, end of a
crazy day. I was you know what

it was? It was right after
the musical chairs thing and we were all

got blown up. I'm yeah,
I got in the middle, so I

was like I had hurt my neck. I was all. I was like

els and you know, sandwiching our
dicks down. I know, I dude.

I was like the glass. I
was like what the Hell is going

on here? This is like the
real do and then, like I remember,

like they're like keep going, keep
going. I didn't know how Marley

to get and I they would just
get flatter and flowered it. I come

on, the might didn't hurt it
all. Did your hurt that really?

Mind hurt when it pulled out,
like well, well, yeah, yeah,

on the way out the different,
but was all was like hating it

down. It's just like you just
watch your Dick get bigger. Yeah,

I'm like tight and Titan tighten.
Yeah, didn't really feel like anything.

You just know it looks cool,
though you're watching your Dick get bigger and

it's incentive keep tightening it. Do
you know? Getting bigger, tighten it.

Did it? Yeah, yeah,
I got like that wide. It

was like three inches wide. You
like some Weird Salamanders? Yeah, it

reminds me like a dead Dick in
a jar or something. Yeah, yeah,

I did. Definitely had that.
No live and I go look,

yeah, it's definitely dead Dick.
Yeah, but yeah, I was pretty

confident it would. Let it would. Yeah, you know, and I

was like, oh the boater.
Yeah, there's no bones in the boner

unless it's unless it's a boner,
and then you got to like a blood

bone. Yeah, we're one of
the only adults without a bone in there.

I'm glad because mine would have broken
so many times and show yours would

have been fucking cap yours would have
been like casted up like fifty times.

For sure. They had to put
a plate in there. Oh my God,

what if you had a metal plate
in your Dick? That would be

freaking horrific. A compound fracture early
bring oh my God, yeah, you

could get Dick. What if all
the chicks like that one like yeah,

he's got a call down fracture,
like they're all psyched on it. Heel

a little bit ry. Okay,
Enough Dick Talk, but Um, no,

come on, I know, I
love it. I was actually I'm

going back to Dick time, but
Oh, come on, did you get

one of these? Oh, dude, I haven't got one yet. I

wonder if dude, I know you
what I was thinking. I thought that

was like a straight up dude.
The thing is so awesome. H Do

it? Do it? Yes,
is it does. It tastes like plastic.

Close. I was closet. I
was pawty as freaking trying to get

you. That's right, there he
did. He got, got me,

got me. That's my list.
Yeah, yeah, I think when in

minute? I know I got it. Order one. Yes, yeah,

I like my law. Keep it
right here. I wonder if like chicks

use it. I think everybody could
using it. Like how would you not

use this? Look at but look
at at you. Yeah, I know,

that's the first time. That's it's
weird. They put my weter in

the Bat. See, there's two
of them. There's like to tell is

like, Chris, this is me
a little point. Think that's like the

no one knows it, but that's
your Dick on the on the tail.

Yeah, we should put it on
that clamp, clip it down. See.

Oh my God, I would be
fucked. I should, I should

get play. Yeah, I like
a little a little blexy, guys.

It's ready for it, but you
should bring you do it. You should

do it and send it to the
group message. That would be classic.

Hey, guess what. What you're
not gonna believe this. Did you know

that the whole other movie that we
have in the can that's coming out at

one point? Yeah, four five, right foot five. I don't know.

WHAT ARE THEY gonna call? Are
gonna cut pollajack? That's forever five.

That's that's a mouthful. I think
it's just kind to be four point

five. It's on a movie,
though, just for I just saw you.

It's a jackets this week for point
five. You don't you know we're

talking about? Yeah, yeah,
no, they know. It's just all

the clips that didn't make it,
which I'm baffled on, like all your

so many good ones. I so, Dude. I think it's going to

be better than forever it. Maybe
that's the thing I did. I've never

felt this way about a point five
before. I know, Dude, I

haven't either, because there's so much
stuff up we didn't use and that's it's

like amazing, like amazing stuff.
I agree, but I can't wait for

everyone to see that. That's when
we I think that's when we shine on

that, on that one. Yeah, do you think August will get released?

Who knows? Do you control that, like you can pull stuff gets

police? Right, yeah, I
try. I have a little part of

it. Like Knoxville asked me,
you know, he tremaine asked me.

He goes, yeah, when you
poobies, when you want this release,

and I just let him know it
depends on the moon and the tides and

everything. So maybe I it's got
to be during a swell, when,

when there's swell, everyone's stoked,
everyone caught a bunch of waves and then

we release it after a big swell. She just wait for the swell and

then. So yeah, yeah,
after a good twelve from time to summer,

late summers. Yeah, like after
the best, well, the summer

and way area, everywhere, every
west coast of California. All right,

yeah, settled, so we can
score and then we can release the movie.

So, but back to that,
back to that stay and that room.

I remember your what room, the
one where we doing the penis freaking

Oh, yeah, what was you? How do you call it? Where

you have that tool and it goes? Smasher, like the SNSTERER. Yeah,

the Dick smasher. But I remember
it was like my last, last

thing of the day and I was
like I have to like getting early here,

and I remember like you're like,
I have to pee, and you

started peen and freaking. I went
down and I opened my mouth and I

was you're about to pee in my
mouth, but I knocks. will cut

it. You pulled out her there
was a long plushy guys think pitch shut

on my pea and then you like
try to some that receive the end of

it, and then your eyes looked
at her, my eyes, and I'm

like yeah, that was that was
our connection. that. Yeah, they're

dripping, dude. I was like
Ah, maybe I went too far,

maybe I went to far, far. I was sorry, I good,

better than go not far enough.
Yeah, for Real, real, I

mean, I had it. I
have a show hi that I'm like really

dedicated, you know. Yeah,
it did show that. Yeah, for

sure, but yeah, that was
classic. I was that's when we became

like brothers right there. That's when
became like the second day I knew you.

Yeah, for sure, by her
picks, Yep eyes and Dick's getting

locked. That eye, Dick,
the shit locked. That isn't like Diggs.

That's so true. That should be
the chapter for that one, as

you be the title. But yeah, that was freaking crazy. And then

I remember like that night we like
Kate, I came down from the hood.

That's when I went to my hotel
room. was like this is freaking

awesome and like I was tripping out
in my hotel room by myself and I

was like all right, I got
it, like get down there for dinner,

and I remember coming down there and
you're all sitting there and I was

like super like, I don't know. Wasn't like a shame, but I

was just like I felt weird,
like they all saw my Dick and like

it's all. You know what I
mean. But no, that's how I

felt. I was new to this, Dude. This is my first take

dinner. No, this was my
you guys were in the lobby before dinner

and we're all meeting up. We
were thinking about it. They're either no,

no, think about where we're going
to eat and what the day of

a lot. I know, I
know you guys now, I know the

thought process now, but yeah,
and then, and then you guys fucked

with me. I came up and
like, I went to shake your guys

his hand. You got and everyone
was like did you wash your hands?

And then I was like, but
joking. Yeah, I know, I

know. I was like well,
I was like, I you guys Yis

I'm not. I'm grind on the
hand. Yeah, I was awesome,

though. It was awesome. I
was like, Dude, you guys are

fucking classic, Dude. But yeah, I was funny. Shit, man,

the the fucking two days test shoot
was epic. Yeah, that was

December two thousand and nineteen. That
crazy, crazy, I thout twenty two.

That's Huh. fucking two years ago. I mean, we'll take please,

more, like you more years ago, more, yeah, not quite.

In December will be three years,
but yeah, more than two years

left, three years, two point
three years. Yeah, we just we

just let him, you know,
let him wait. I didn't want that

one to come out for two years. I didn't want that one to come

out. Yeah, held it,
we had it. Yeah, like just

just let her. Yeah, just
freaking live your lifestyle. And then what's

in your hand? I've puff bar
so, that one that was able pluck.

Yeahs the Bob Plug. It's a
vibrator to it's a vibrated out like

this. It really is, probably
for the chicks. Dude. That's crazy

looking. I know it's freaking horrible. It's addicting. So fuck. I

had some great abs, some great
news, but it it. I'm getting

a chill on discovery plus. Oh, yeah, hell, yeah, what's

it called? It's called what not
to do. What not to do?

Yeah, but not to do.
There's things about to do. They'll never

ride. No, it's gonna.
I know it's when you like a thousand

seasons, dude, I'm like eighty. Film and what not to do.

Yeah, but yeah, it's me
and the guy from mythbusters, Tory Marselli.

Oh yeah, so me and yeah, graduation. Thanks. Yeah,

tripp trip hooked it up. Trip
got it for to it your own jackets,

right. Yeah, trip trips to
meason. I'm on Jackass. He's

the man. Dude. Yeah,
Dude, trip choking. You have left

it right. Well, he's the
MA. He never helped. He ever.

Look at this thing. It's liquid
weed. No Way, wow,

liquid will lead. I wish I
could take a shot with you. I've

got it. Chairs, I got
a little joint. I gotta Joy.

Right, cheers to that. Chairs
of that chairs. Yeah, liquid,

we that things. I got good
to do. You got a lot there.

It's like, yeah, he's got
his old bottle of weed. He's

it's Curu sit in my garage for
this cold. Oh, did you take

a shot before you go surfy?
Oh, you got in the fridge too.

Huh, that is awesome, Dude. Yeah, I bump. I

can't. I'm not gonna be able
surf. You got the giant tent delivered,

like, Oh, I'm trying to
lift it like a dummy, and

I popped the fucking thing. You
popped a blood vessel. Are you like?

Open? You know the Trnia we
have. Fuck your stomach all open,

a little bit in your fucking guts. Are Like, Oh, yeah,

get out. Hurt. Did hurt? It feel like Weirds, like

some kicked in the nuts. I
hope you get better, Dude, because

we need a surfing skate. I
just got a new surfboard by haven't got

it. Yeah, I was gonna
pick it up soon down south. An

album, company album. Tell them
surf where there's from sank clemente. Oh,

sick album surf. I probably pace
upwards. I was all excited to

pick it up and then like,
I get kept her for a also,

if I can lag on that.
Well, you come pick it up and

there's waves and we'll go serf.
Well, yeah, we'll go straight to

lowers and just snake everyone. I
don't know what that would that trestles or

something. Yeah, no, chusels. Yeah, yeah, so many.

Nobody is well, it's all right, I'll freak him. I'll tell everyone

to get out of the way.
Eating by poles, eat by a shark.

I heard you really got this bit
by a seagull. Is that true?

And Yeah, sure, yeah,
I was a seagull. Yeah,

yeah, I knew it. Yeah, we try to. They'd all the

charts and that. Dude. Photo
shops. Photoshops everything. Man, photoshop

works really good. Oh, dude, I don't forgot my lighter. Damn,

I got one. Can Use it
working. Yeah, got it.

I like Mike Peter Love that.
They were starting like you might your computer

on virus like coming off. I
think is sick. Oh Dude, those

are freaking their paper stickers, I
think. Yeah, yeah, they're not.

Their greatest stickers. I don't know. I wish they made but I

wish they didn't make the paper ones, but they are good for everything.

I put them all over my town. Yeah, everywhere. I put them

everywhere. Let people know. Yeah, if they were woning, it's because

they're wondering if that gets forever.
With a heart for the beat. Yeah,

how's your Valentin's Day? Mellow,
the day before is my wife's birthday,

so we pretty much rage that day. Night will Sunday. While everyone

else's watching sports, we're we're getting
romantic. Wes Hell. Yeah, yeah,

I was coming back home from Vegas
on downtown's Day. All right,

good for you. Yeah, it
was fun. I had my Valentines Day

getting Hett. He's all the way
home from Vegas. Jesus fucking Christ,

poopies. All right, it's great
POOPI's all right. What might says day.

I look and the thing it's my
says, David, you're sad.

Straw hat. So that's my media
company. Reminds me of it when I

was a kid and here member county, the local pizza places were called Straw

happy. I don't know how bigger
chain it was. Could be other places.

They've ever heard it. Straw Hat
Pizza Anna today like the game.

So it's just a place called happy
and they had that was the first place

I ever stop. PAC man video
game shot. It came out with pack

man. They didn't have all dialed
in, so you could like you can

like unscrew the KNOB. Yes,
I have no know who we would unscrew

and then put it in the solid
bar. But that with the Cherry tomatoes,

it was God stuff fuck Cherry Tomato
in it and it's flamming onto the

video. Got The fuck are we
watch? All casuals are casual. Were

like twelve years. It's like it's
someone would come buy, put a quarter

in. Why are they just squeeze
the fucking Cherry Tomato there? I wasn't

only of my God stickering in the
corner. And then they took what is

genius. We see the person that
would go to the sal bar and they

go, I'Ma have this bill tomato
and they put them like a yeah,

he controlled aby their stuff. That
dude laugh too times. Even actually grab

it. But yeah, I'm rather
double frank. Ever, Oh my God,

that is genius. That is fuckings
dude. I'm drum HAP. People

I'll never forget it. Dude.
That's so fucking classic. Then, Dude,

how did you even think that one
that? Yeah, I just go

unscrew it. Look at it.
Well, look, it looks like yeah,

sure, tomatoes, sting, light
bulb, Youa Straw had. Media

is in no way associated with Straw
had pizza. But if they are listening

to this, we are always looking
for sponsorship opportunities. Yeah, did like

growing up as a surf crum.
We're definitely doing some fucked up shit to

all the tourists or the people,
that the adults, you know. Yeah,

but, yeah, we hated the
adults. We used to. We

go to either side of the road
when a car is come and then we

would both lean back to your one
some one side the road, one on

the other, and you'd lean back
like you have a rope that you're oh,

yeah, yeah, yeah, we
don't even have anything. Yeah,

I really if people slam their no
matter what anything I did, dude,

that's selling. That Issak. Do
you have you ever done the duct tape

on the road? Nobody do with
that. So you do a big you

do a strip of duct tape where
they're tired. Yeah, where their tire

goes on the road and then if
fucking sticks in their tire and then starts

flapping on their tire like it's a
flat tire. So they plug over and

they'd fucking duct tape all of them. Yeah, that was a good one.

We love doing that one, Dude. We love doing that. We

are at the beach all day,
right next to coast highway. That's all

we did all day. Yeah,
we had all kinds of shit, but

we were bad way throat. With
a bunch of Lemon Orchard nearby, we'd

always throw the lemons at their cars
and and hope they chase this to the

lemon tree. Yeah, a change, because we knew all the secret ways.

For sure. You like come a
get it, like hell, yeah,

howdy come M's so good. And
then behind neighborhoods do we had all

these things like called tar are the
other like jump over, you know.

So we would have a mean dog
in their backyard and but you know just

how to run for you and get
it and hope they person chase you and

maybe the dog getting them. And
okay, they're awesome. There's a lot

of different thing stuff. Fuck,
that's funny. Yeah, tear trails with

the tear trails of Kia tear shells, a Camario. Yeah, yeah,

founded by Larry Boord a lot Larry
bottle found. Yeah, as he wasn't

too stoked on you guys, was
he? No, no, Larry Bordelat

was with my friend who he was
the one always he created the tear till.

You like, here's the way we
go. No, no way.

Used it like the worst trailer.
You could take three people's cards, everything

to get chased by, you know, ads. You're being chased. You

lure some off the road to chase
you characters. And then there we got

cars. Weird. This is the
first thing we did week. Card we

see how many, how many front
longs, we could drive through her row

shot up. Yeah, like you
could get through alive. O Care about

the bushes and Shit? Yeah,
if do, you guys do? You

guys a horrible behavior, but us, I know, for some reason,

when we were like sixteen years old. Yeah, I mean got that there.

There's no security cameras or cell phone. No one had a out of

way to record anything. They're like
think a picture here that I'M gonna go

down to this phok man in a
week where I get my film back I'm

gonna find out. You know,
no one do. Yeah, yeah,

do. You can't use no way
of getting caught. Did I wish I

live back in that way. If
to get caught like you, not not

as easy today. It would be
like it would be like I owe.

Your son was at my freaking was
it? Saw Your son running through my

yard d our night on my ring. Yeah, you got your son was

making loud noise with all his friends
there, and I don't know what they're

doing, but they're over there taking
a shit in the freaking lawn. Did

I? Yeah, I've done the
the Shit Doggie door, the fucking fire

of the bag like bag. I
said if fine, roll it went horrible,

but all right, I did to
the wrong person, Bro I did

it to the wrong person. Who
would be the right person to do it

here? You know, an old
lady or an old man or like someone

that's doesn't have a gun, and
you rap further leg or something with the

lady flips and like the dives,
because she was like stopping on Shit with

flipp reach fire each it. Yeah, I don't know. I thought we

were like, Oh, no,
due. I thought I was like Billy

Madison, you know you are I
really wasn't. And then so we did

that and we're hiding in the bushes. We light the bag on fire,

we're lighting the bushes and then the
guy comes out and he like puts it

out with like water and they like
sweeps it off to his lawn. He's

gets a broom sweeps it out,
but I was running in my fucking shoes.

Fell off through the ice plant both
so he know just one. So

he sees the shoe and then he
sees he fucking hears us, because we

fucking can't stop laughing. So we're
fucking laughing our guts off and he hears

us and we're behind this dumpster on
the other side of the street at in

the apartment complex dumpster, like hiding
behind the wall, and he fucking sees

us and he fucking we tried running
and he fucking got us and he got

me. He fucking got me because
I was like trying to grab my shoe

from him too. So I wanted
my shoe back. So I was like

trying to grab my shoe and give
this show up. Man, Bro I

couldn't. Dude, I only had
one pair of shoes. I'm not we

had to go hang out with chicks
that night. It was like the Surf

Shop Party or some Shit. And
build the tails. You're a man.

My off, my shoe is some
crazy by. So he yeah, but

fucking he got me, Dude.
He grabbed me by the bat. Who

Pulls me back? And then he
takes me hostage. He takes me hostage

into his, his apartment, and
then wait, but you inflate. Yeah,

but before he took me hostage,
he put me in his car.

So he grabbed me, put me
in his car and then, yeah,

so, sorry, I'm getting ahead
of myself. I'm getting to hell of

myself. So this guy puts me
on sh you kind of cool for a

second there. Know, it turns
out. Turns out. Yeah, he

was gnarly dude. So he puts
me in the car, but he told

my friends. He goes. If
you guys don't come over here right now,

I'm going to take your friend of
the desert and kill him. So,

Dude, I'm tripping on my guys. Hell, where did it?

Where'd he's saying that to them from? where? Like they're they ran away.

They're like for twenty yards away,
like thirty yards away, yelling that

out. Yeah, other people here. It's yeah, he don't give a

fuck. Wow, he was pissed. He was pissed because the grams got

them, the fucking groums. He
knows about the rats. He knows about

us, calls bad rats. So
like he freaking grab me. Of course

I'm the one who gets caught.
I'm always the one who gets caught.

and He puts me in the trunk
and he shuts the trunk and then he

goes around the block like a bunch
of times and he fucking comes back and

fucking because actually before he put me
in the shrunky goes, you guys better

come over here all summer, you
know, take him to the desert,

kill him. So my boys runt
to the surf shop and tell the older

guys at the surf shop you're the
desert and kill himself. Yeah, yeah,

so the buzz go to the serf
shop. My boys go to the

surf shop and fucking tell the older, older guys what happened. They got

poopies. freaking this guy's got poopies. So that the guy drives me back

to his house, because we're like
probably like three blocks from the surf shop

to blocks, super close. So
the guy drives him back to his house,

puts me in the house and he's
got a fake gun, but the

time I thought it was a real
gun. Who is this guy's the latest

choices to deal with this? He's
like, I'll just stop, put it

on my crunkle private POW. Like
yeah, he was, like he was.

He was just got my good get
my old fake gun out. Yeah,

he was, good, do we're
we're tripping, dude. I was

tripping. I was like you're fucking
crazy, dude. And then he held

me hostage in his house and then
the boys showed up knocking on the door

with baseball bats, and then so
and then I'm like, dude, he's

like, you're really further and then
he goes no, he goes, tell

your boys the back off. Tell
your boys the back off right now.

So I go, okay, boys, back off, back off, like

he's gonna let me out. And
fucking Dude, the he's opens the door

and the older guys go Zach,
and they fucking knew the guy and they

go what's up? Oh, you
fucking with poopies? YEA, and the

guy goes yeah, I'm just fucking
with poopies. He didn't know my name

was poopies, but he's like yeah, I'm just fucking with them and the

and everyone's like Oh, all happy. I don't think so, but you

knew someone. Sorry too, because
when got around his broth yet a kind

of more normal. Yeah, yeah, because the boys shot like older dudes,

like they're like thirty five, maybe
like thirty, and I was only

like fucking maybe like one, nineteen, two thousand and twenty one. But

you're that's what age the story was
from. Yeah, I think so,

maybe eighteen. I got damn it, I thought you're thirteen at most.

Maybe it was. No, I'm
I'm pretty surely sorry. I'm pretty sure

you're like eight or nineteen. Laden
Shit, I'm fire people's doorge steps ages

just a number. Great. How
old were you we we started deck ass

forever? I was like thirteen going
into fourteen. How old are you when

we started filming the movie Deck Ass
Forever? Oh, I was thirty three.

Thirty three, I was the best
young first started Jack as I was

thirty. That weird. The weird
thing time of starts of the are pretty

but I know right. I think
it's just super stupid, extra stupid.

Yeah, it's pretty trippy, though, yeah, it's pretty weird. It's

weird. I love doing it though, but yeah, that was this shit

bag story. And then so that
was at the sear shot. We have

so many good times at the surf
shop. Yeah, I said, hang

out like a surface skate shop,
our DUB SERF shower. And then,

yeah, all the skate shots.
So Fun to just when your kids just

to skate and then just with too
hot outside of ever, just taking this

in the shop there on video.
Yeah, originally you're from Missouri. Oh,

Missouri. Yeah, but before Missouri
I was a I was a Riverside

Valley Drum. Oh Really? Yeah, I didn't really know what I wanted

to do. Like, it was
kind of weird. I don't know.

I was a djedd out. Like
my parents were like trying to figure out

what was wrong with me and like
I was like jumping from desk to desk,

like just beating mayhem. Dude,
I was freaking mayhem. I used

to have a leash and shit,
dude, a Rainbow Leash, I remember,

and fucking our able one, most
craziest kid. Yeah, rainbow one

it was. It was pretty freaking
sick. We realize this is the third

time in three episodes that poopies has
brought up the Rainbow Leash. Get used

to it, because this story will
most likely be repeated a lot. But

yeah, so redlands and then my
mom split up and remarried to my step

dad, Scott, which is he's
I'm so grateful for him because he takes

care of my mom and and she, yeah, she has a lot of

like health problems and stuff. So
he's there to take care of her.

So that's a like because if he
wasn't there, I would have to be

there and then I wouldn't be here. You know, family first, but

so very grateful for him. But
Missouri for from third grade to eighth grade,

because I moved to Missouri and I
was in fourth grade. But the

age different. There's differ the age
school, the school age difference there.

All you know how to fucking I
start talking about school, I started fucking

having flashbacks vision date, the great
great yeah, the great system was it

wasn't like California was. So I
showed up and I'll showed up there and

I was in fourth grade. Then
they put me back the third grade.

Yeah, so I was like no
way. So now I'm a third grader

and now, like my reputations,
just like blowing the water, because they're

like why did you go back to
third grade? I was like, I

don't know, like the age school
difference, right, yeah, no way,

you're just stupid or some ship.
But you the whole different crowd of

people, right, the whole different
yeah, shall us. So I moved

to Missouri and I made all these
friends in fourth grade and they loved me

and I was sick. A school
came and then no. And when I

went to fourth grade in Missouri,
was sick. I was killing it.

I fucking had friends, and then
they go, Oh, you need to

go back to third grade and I
was like what? So I go back

to the wait late. You'd already
been in for yeah, I was already

been in fourth grade and they like, Oh, no, you needs to

go back, and I was like
no way, Dude. So now I

went back to third grade. Third
Grade socked, fucking suck. The third

grade is sucked, and I'd see
all my fourth grade friends like I wish

I was in fourth grade. So
from right then I like hateed school.

I was like fuck school, Dude, like they just put me back a

very for you. What your kid
like? That devastate you for real,

dude, not have to make new
friends. And now I'm in third grade

and next thing you know, I'm
getting swung by my hair and my feet

and they're swinging me and my brother
comes out. My brother was in sixth

grade. My brother comes out.
It was at recess and he comes out

for recess, sees this and beats
the shit out of these kids. These

differnt yeah, anybody. Yeah,
a bigger guy, you're older and you

go to the younger pass and they're
pulling. I was the same size because

I was little. So, yeah, now I got the third graders.

Is punk in my ass. So, yeah, school. I hated fucking

school, Dude. But yeah,
but you gotta do you gotta do it.

You got to go to school and
get you gotta go to school.

You gotta do it. Something you
gotta do. It made me stronger as

a human though, you know,
like going through all that, you know,

because now I love part of a
lot of it's just get the social

interaction at school, you know.
Yeah, it was weird lot of people

on mine. Now, I don't
know. I don't know. I was

I was just like I're for to
be there to deal with the show.

You how life really is. Yeah, maybe I was like to to like,

I don't know, interactive or something. I don't know. Maybe I

was too too socials, you know, because I was just like, Oh,

you know, fuck, you want
to play. You want to play.

I just wanted to play. You
know what I mean? And I

people, think people, the kids, probably seen that like Oh, this

kids fucking just wants to play all
day. Let's fuck with him, you

know, or some shit. I
don't know. Quite different. Kids are

happy for some school work. I
don't want to play, Dude. Kids

are not any bother. Listen,
they listen to their teacher. He didn't

your the fourth grade teachers. Just
get this kid out of my class.

Ha Ha, for right. Yeah, we're back in third grade. Yeah,

like, look here, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

I'm free to the teachers. Like
teachers, like Hey, kids grabbing

by the hair and sweet around,
sick of him. Yeah, fired,

if I do it, you do
it real, for real. I'll give

you all, as if by the
hair, every reason. Ha Ha,

ha, ha ha ha, dude, for Real, did it was fucking

classic. But that was the that
was actually the school that Preston went to,

and Missouri not. That's I it's
just all. I tell that story

all the time. I'm like true
to people on Jackasser from the exact same

place and you'll never get to it. It's few and Preston, and didn't

both your dad's work in the same
dynamite factory something? Yeah, the same

dynamite factory. Yeah, my step
dad still works, though. Both our

dads worked the same dynamite weird.
Did Dynamite factory? Like? Yeah,

I mean Preston Dad, their big
service the tide of my heat every day.

Yeah, sorry, he's been doing
it for like twenty years. Dude.

It's not on the same shit every
day. Imagine that. You know,

Dude, I like, I like
put the Gunpotrid, the big red

thing of it down, put the
fuse in, put the cap on neck.

No, I don't think it's like
that bird couble. Here he like

a couple of them are blowing up. Of that cartoon blown up. Look,

it's like a right ha ha ha. No, I don't think it's

like that. I think it's more
of just like fucks. I think it's

more of him like driving a golf
car around. It's all underground. But

yeah, yeah, yeah, explosions
going off behind him and shit. Yeah,

I know, but yeah, it's
crazy. The dino factories actually all

underground. It's all like, dude, it's all a granite or limestone.

It's all limestone. So they used
a limestone to make that dynamite. It's

a huge it's a huge underground fucking
facility. Dude, you would trip.

I've been down there. It's fucking
crazy. Antally, when people have a

strong firecracker they're always like that cordite
ward always says that, you know,

like really big firecracker. It's a
quarters dynamite. Like what the fuck is

that? White right coming out a
quarter stick, a diners take of dynamite

will fucking blow up the mountain.
Yeah, that Shit's fucking early. We

should test. We should find out. hunding. Yeah, so it's a

big thing on the Internet about these
this whale that had been beached and was

like thinking of the feat organs.
So they're like they followed dynamite under it

to blow it up. That was
a pollution due how like, yeah,

so there you see that video.
It's the best to because, yeah,

well, it's just getting crushes to
make have it was just so good.

Oh, dude, there's like there's
people trying to like take pictures of it

and shit tune their way. They're
like way too close. It all goes

to yeah, just just so much
dynamite. They blew the fuck out of

that fucking whale everywhere. Just ruined
everything for everybody. That's fucked up.

They should like at least they should
at least. I take like go bury

it somewhere dad or something. That's
not a proper burial. For a while.

Brook it up. Guys like you. We've tried this, we tried

that, and that's blow it up. I'm all about proper burials. That's

not a proper burial. It was
stinking up the whole community. That's what

they're trying to get rid of.
The smell of it. That was the

problem. There were just having fun, like Hey, let's blowing us.

They're like just trying to get rid
of it. Okay, yeah, fuck,

that's I just. I will,
I will, I just. I

hate seeing wells get blown up.
Dude, I don't like either. Maby

was dead and the joke was on
the people. Really could I? Oh,

yeah, how do you know who
am? I died, I don't

know. And then and then it's
and then it's then lays, then it

just sits there and just rots and
stinks the whole community out. Yeah,

it was still just everywhere. Ye, your kids are just eating. Well,

fucking Carki is from the fucking sand. I was at the beach with

my friend a few years ago and
his dog the big whip carcuts, and

his dog ran and started like drolling
around in middle of it like it inside

the whale, just like you know, like a dog will rubbittire on the

grass and stuff. was doing that
inside the whale and then at friends like

yeah, there, get how there, you got it out and we had

to get put the tuget car with
us. Yeah, didn't want to go

then and just wanted to go so
like we couldn't get it to like print

sauce. It's just this just covered
in rotten whales. He you think,

worst thing I ever smelled, except
one time I boiled up Helpkin's head.

That's dunk really bad. What the
Fuck I was? I just wanted to

hold I thought maybe if my boil
as this outdoor boiler thing. Yeah,

but it has. It was so
staky there till I turn it off.

was just vombiting as C are you
gonna eat it where you gonna eat it

or I kept it for a couple
years, but finally a dog came over

in and grabbed it. No Way, cheat it all up, but I

had do. That dog was probably
so stoked. Yeah, yeah, he

was stucks. I was super bumped
box, I bet. Dude, that's

fucked. Do you have it for
the years? There's that smell. was

because it was already a rotten skull. You know, Dude, what already

nasty, like zombied legend in you're
such a legend and I wish we can

talk about more. We get talked
for freaking out, wars and hours.

I'll come back on next time.
Yeah, you are legend. Thank you

so much for doing a legend.
I want to. I want to come

sirve with you when you're when you're
growing. Let me growing. I gotta

got a little fuck growing. If
Youre right now, will stop jacking off

and freaking heal that thing. Okay, now, just do that. I'm

up. You're right on that.
All right, for later, Bro Thank

you for joining us for another doozy
of an episode of the Shiniest podcast with

poopies. Will see you back here
next week and until then, stay short,

the shittiest podcast is produced by the
world's worst people, Tyler Nielsen,

Bryan Tillison Frank Trisco, and narrated
by me, the narrator. Special thanks

to the Straw hot team
The Shittiest Podcast w/ Poopies
This podcast is indescribably sh*tty, but we’ll take a stab at describing it. Riding high on the success of Jackass Forever, Poopies wanted to make a podcast for all... View More

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